Beautiful Ruins

As a teenager I dreamed of being a Christian "hero." I would give everything and go anywhere for my Lord. I committed to live for Him, "whatever the cost." Little did I understand the depth and breadth of those words. Little did I know what "cost" was. Little did I anticipate the unexpected twists and turns my life would take. Little did I realize what "count it all joy when you fall into various trials" meant.

My journey has involved death. Death of myself, my ways, my ambitions. In essence, it has meant a coming to ruins, so that the Lord may create something beautiful from the ashes. Beautiful ruins. It has not been a life of ease, but it has been one full of joy; joy in knowing intimately the unfailing love of my Lord. All other life is nothing compared to this knowing.

I know the journey is not over yet. I know there are unforeseen trials yet to come. But I also know the goodness of my Lord, and because of His goodness I will dance. I will "count it all joy" so that from the ashes, beauty will arise. Beautiful ruins.

Thoughts inspired from this post by Sally Clarkson.

Cupcaking

One of my favorite new fascinations in the kitchen these days is the art of cupcakes. A few years ago, I paid no attention to these little bites of cake and creamy confection. I rarely baked them in favor of a more moist, layered slice of indulgence. But as growing trends have popularized the once ordinary dessert, I have found myself on the bandwagon trying to make the yummiest possible five bites of deliciousness. I even have this illusive dream of someday opening up a cupcake shop in town!

After experimenting with many flavors, mixes, recipes, I still have not yet created my piece de resistance, but have learned a few things along the way:

Number One- Do not overfill the cupcake papers. Filling the papers a smidgen past half full will result in a beautiful rounded top.

Number Two- Watch the cakes at the end of the bake time to pull them out at just the right time. If you bake them too long they will be dry. The tops should bounce back with a little give when you gently push them with your finger to ensure moistness.

Number Three- Brush the tops with a simple syrup immediately out of the oven. This marinates the cakes with the kind of flavor found in layer cakes. One of my favorites is a mixture of sugar and water boiled into a syrup with the addition of pure almond extract.

Number Four- Top with an exquisite frosting. Vanilla buttercream and cream cheese are two of my favorites.

Number Five- Refrigerate overnight in a sealed container for the best infusion of flavor.

Enjoy!!!

Project Fifty-Two

Each new year brings with it wonderful musings of thoughts, goals, ideas for the upcoming months. It creates a time to think and pray about what of the past needs to be dropped, and what of the future must be accomplished. After much musing, I conclude the same thing each year. No matter where life's road turns, I have one desire: to know the Maker of my entire being more deeply and to be filled with His pleasant aroma which can then overflow into the lives of my children and the people around me. The simple goal of knowing Him and teaching my little ones of His wonders puts all other things into perspective.

That being said, I have put together somewhat of a practical wish list of things I would like to do in the year 2010, not resolutions, just wishes. As I began to compile the list, it grew and grew until I finally decided to limit it to fifty-two. One wish fulfilled for each week of the year. Feel free to walk with me as I take baby steps towards order and beauty and the cultivation of art and soul. I would even love to see your wish list of fifty-two.

1. Paint the family room and office.
2. Post fifty-two blog posts.
3. Complete the reading of my chronological Bible.
4. Read a classic.
5. Sew a lap quilt.
6. Explore downtown Denver.
7. Hang curtains in the family room.
8. Organize photos.
9. Finish a puzzle.
10. Study a book on photography.
11. Eat a cupcake at Happy Cakes.
12. Learn how to make Beef Wellington.
13. Study the manual for my camera.
14. Develop portrait photography skills.
15. Plant Zinnias.
16. Hike the Incline.
17. Get away alone with my husband.
18. Arrange a performance by my children for a retirement home.
19. Customize a slipcover for my sofa.
20. Improve my low light photography abilities.
21. Construct cupcake boxes for Valentine's Day.
22. Grow Daisies.
23. Have tea in Monument.
23. Travel with the family to Glenwood Springs.
24. Complete the family picture/art wall.
25. Go camping.
26. Sew pillows.
27. Fit into my favorite black skirt (sit-ups required).
28. Organize my creative space.
29. Paint the girl's dresser.
30. Learn to bake artisan breads.
31. Develop my own signature cupcakes.
32. Remodel the extra bathroom.
33. Remove the wallpaper in the master bathroom.
34. Hang towel hooks.
35. Narrate aloud The Hobbit to the boys.
36. Read a book (or two, or three, or four) by George MacDonald.
37. Visit an art museum as a family.
38. Paint the back entryway white.
39. Make a toy theater out of a moving box with the children.
40. Customize my own blog page design....MAJOR learning curve.
41. Run a 5K.
42. Host a gathering for the neighborhood women.
43. Sew a new apron.
44. Peruse and collect books of great artists.
45. Start a family nature journal.
46. Sew messenger bags with the girls.
47. Braid a rag rug.
48. De-clutter the office.
49. Stencil a sign.
50. Create a custom wardrobe from bargain, vintage finds.
51. Enjoy recommended books from Read for the Heart.
52. Above all, know the Master Creator of my soul.

Lessons From a Soup Pot

The other day I decided to have a try at making French Onion Soup. I searched the web for recipes, read blogs on technique, then made my way to the store for sherry, beef broth, Gruyere cheese, and a lot of onions. I cried my way through the slicing then piled the onions in a roaster (since I do not own a Dutch oven) with a whole stick of butter. Setting the oven timer for one hour, I cleaned up the kitchen, tucked the children into bed, and waited. At the sound of the timer, I opened the oven door to the lovely aroma of cooked onions, stirred them, then returned the pan into the oven to bake one hour and a half more. Once the baking was complete, I began the next process of caramelizing. Setting the pot on the stove, I added one-fourth cup of water, scraped the bottom of the pan, and waited once again as the liquid cooked off of the onions. After repeating this process three more times, I finally added the Sherry and patiently stirred and scraped as it evaporated as well, leaving the onions ready for the final step of simmering in beef broth with a little thyme and bay leaf. As the liquid simmered, I realized how much I had savored the slow process that would result in a decadent soup to be enjoyed by my family.

In this fast paced, microwave generation, we sometimes miss the enjoyment slow, methodical cooking provides. A good French Onion Soup cannot be rushed. It takes time and patience. As I contemplated this idea, I realized the same is true for parenting. Parenting requires hours and hours of preparation and input. It involves tears as children grow from the raw personalities that they are into aromatic individuals full of life to give back to this world. It cannot be rushed neither neglected. But just as I relished the procedure for creating a delectable French Onion Soup, I am learning to cherish the hours required to faithfully train and equip the children entrusted to my care. And as I do so, I am beginning to understand a little more deeply the Father heart of God, as He too seeks to mold me into an aromatic individual suited for His purposes.

Julie, Julia, and Me

Today I enjoyed a delightful escapade from the normal routine of life. The four children happily cared for by their adoring grandparents left me hours on end to spend in solitude. What to do with such a gift? My first response....Barnes and Noble Bookstore.

With an armful of books and a chai tea in hand, I spent a good portion of my day capturing great amounts of inspiration. Perusing books on blogging, decorating, cooking, sewing, photography, and the classics set the wheels of ideals into motion. I even ran into my favorite idealist while wandering the rows and rows of books. (It's amazing how this blog world makes me feel kin to someone I have not really ever spent time with in person.)

After absorbing a good portion of information which was carefully noted on the backs of receipts, napkins, or whatever source of paper could be found, I made way to my next destination...the paper store. With gift card in hand, I whittled away more than an hour admiring ribbon, paper, stamps, embellishments, and finally walked away with a bagful of treasures. A haircut, supper at a special cafe, and a little more shopping left me readied for my quiet home and a favorite movie.

Even though it is my third viewing of Julie and Julia in the past month, I find the story does not get old. I suppose I love it so much because it embraces so many of my passions: cooking, family, relationships, hospitality, writing, blogging. I laugh, as I realize that before the movie I had little interest in pearls, I thought Julia Child wrote The Joy of Cooking, and I imagined a good blog involved well thought paragraphs and preparation. Since first viewing the movie, I have learned to enjoy the down to earth conversation that takes place in blogosphere, I cook French Onion Soup, I admire a nice string of pearls when I pass by the jewelry in the department stores, and I consider Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child a high priority on my kitchen wish list. It's somewhat silly how one movie has changed my perspective and even inspired me to live more artfully, but it also is encouraging. You see, the real Julie Powell is somewhat of a crass individual and a seemingly unlikely candidate for inspiration. She has been criticized for her inappropriate language and lifestyle, yet she has inspired a story that is sure to send more cooks to the kitchen, more families to the dinner table, and more relationships valued. I am encouraged by this, that one ordinary human being with great faults could inspire so many people, simply by drawing public attention to the work of her inspiration, Julia Child.

Why am I encouraged by this? I am a faulty parent, wife, human being who simply wishes to live my life serving the greatest of inspiration, my Saviour, Jesus Christ and draw the attention of everyone I meet to His goodness. I am an unworthy candidate, full of faults; but in some small way I can inspire simply by living out each day the life He gifts to me. No, I may never inspire the masses, but I hope to leave a legacy with the four precious children entrusted to my care. That being said, I am renewed to pursue all things necessary to accomplish the goal before me; to live artfully, purposefully, daily for the One who gave His life for me.

Wrapping Up

Christmas Day is drawing near. The gifts are bought, and most are wrapped. For a moment I stop and breathe as I check my unending list of preparations. What must I still accomplish? What project shall I abandon?

In the hurry of the season with Christmas concerts to attend, goodies to bake, parties to plan, traditions to uphold, my adrenaline kicks in with a sudden sense of urgency. My heart pounds. My breathe shortens, and I almost forget the Reason for it all. The Prince of Peace was born over 2,000 years ago, not to bring stress, pressure, deadlines: but rather peace. Peace in the midst of chaos. Peace that exudes from the very core of my being, because He is the core of my being. Peace that understands He is in control even when my world seems spinning out of control.

I stop, I meditate, I remember the One who was born in a stable that infamous Christmas night and breathe a little deeper. Life still spins, but I no longer spin with it. I stand calm in the midst of the storm, for I know Him who calms the storm. I remove my vision from the waves of life, and focus my gaze into the eyes of my beloved Lord of all the universe. For it is He who "keeps in perfect peace the mind who is focused on Him."

I laugh, I love, I feel lighter. I go about the tasks before me renewed yet grounded, grounded in the overwhelming security of the Son of God who loves me, and paves the way before me.

Celebrating the....

ADVENTUROUS....JOYFUL...CRAZY.... GENTLE...FRIENDLY.....
HANDSOME...GENEROUS.......CARING.... SMART...KIND ....QUIRKY...FUNNY.....GIFTED......man I love on his birthday.

Reflections from the Berkshires

This morning I found myself contemplating the rhythmic melody of my life which seems to sway quite persistently from quiet moments of inspiration to draining bursts of activity, and remembered the lovely thoughts I gained from my time in the Berkshire this summer.

With rolling hills and quaint village like towns filled with ample music and art to nourish a contemplative soul such as myself, this New England haven provided days of pure enjoyment while I explored its art galleries, museums, gardens, and shops with my family. On one particular day I set off on my own to wander the lovely streets of Stockbridge, the dearly loved home of Norman Rockwell, and stumbled across a hidden cafe where I sipped chocolate infused chai and processed the sights, smells and sounds of my morning. Every part of me had been refreshed with nourishment for the road ahead. I had no idea at that time how busy life would become or how frantically I would long to be back in the Berkshires sipping chai with nothing significant to do; but rather I was inspired and hopeful for the upcoming adventures a new school year would deliver. In that moment I realized the importance of rhythm and balance in life. My cup was full and overflowing with the anticipation to give, work, create, and welcome. Yet if that cup was not poured out, the contents would become stagnant and useless. On the other hand, if I would continue to pour out without taking opportunity to refuel , I would be left drained of all resources with nothing to give. Therein, I was reminded of the many times God used quietness and solitude in the lives of His heroes to prepare them for the wearisome, stormy battles ahead. Moses had his desert, David had his pasture, and Elijah had his brook. The contemplation of such great lives enjoying moments of refreshment encouraged me to breathe in and enjoy the calm with deep contentment.

Since that day in the Berkshire, life's pace has quickened to the beat of battle for the sake of four growing souls entrusted to my care. The days of nurturing, praying, teaching, talking, listening, exemplifying find my weary body ready to collapse into bed each night for a few moments of respite before another day dawns, but I take refreshment in remembering that time where my soul was restored, and my body prepared to do the work I have before me. And I take courage, knowing that the Restorer of my soul knows my weaknesses and infirmities and gives pockets of refreshment along the way to give me strength for the wonderful journey He has placed before me.

The Doors of the Berkshire